Thursday, June 30, 2011

Stop Forwarding That Crap To Me

Another gift from Stephie.


We had some offenders in common.  

Shup.

The lyrics:

Oh the sand keeps falling through the hourglass
And there's no way you're going to slow it down
You say we gotta treasure each moment
Who knows how long we're gonna be around

Yeah you keep on telling me life is short
And its hard to disagree with what you say
But if time is so precious why ya wasting mine
'Cause I'm always reading, always deleting
Every useless piece of garbage that you send my way

Every stupid hoax
All those corny jokes
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Well I don't need tons of cringe-inducing puns
Stop forwarding that crap to me

No it isn't okay if you brighten my day 
With some cut-and-pasted hackneyed Hallmark poetry
And I didn't request a personality test
Stop forwarding that crap to me

Ahhhh...
You're sending virus-laden bandwidth-hogging attachments 
To every single person you know
You're passing around a link to some dumb thing on YouTube
That everybody else already saw three years ago
And wacky badly Photoshopped billboards 
Were never that amusing to me
And I just can't believe you believe those urban legends
But I have high hopes 
Someone will point you toward Snopes
And debunk that crazy junk you're spewing constantly

No I don't want a bowl of Chicken Soup for the Soul
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Send more top 10 lists and I'll slash my wrists
Please stop forwarding that crap to me

Well I'm sorry i can't accept your paranoid rant
And I don't want the Neiman Marcus cookie recipe

Won't you kindly refrain 'cause it's hurting my brain
Stop forwarding... that crap to me

Like glittery hearts and unicorns 
And pictures of somebody's cat
Now tell me, in what alternate reality 
Would I care about something like that?

And by the way, your quotes from George Carlin 
Aren't really George Carlin
Mr. Rogers never fought the Viet Cong
And Bill Gates is never gonna give me somethin' for nothin'
And I really doubt some dead girl is gonna kill me 
If I don't pass her letter along

Well now I know you're wishin'
I'll sign your petition
But stop forwarding that crap to me
And I don't want to read your series 
Of conspiracy theories
Just stop forwarding that crap to me

And your two million loser friends
All have my address now, 
'Cause you never figured out the way to BCC

Now I gotta insist
Take me off of your list
Stop forwarding that crap to me
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Just stop it now
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Oh, no
(Stop forwarding that crap to me) 
Ohhh...

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
I can't take it
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Aw, please
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
You gotta stop
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Right now
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
I'm not kidding!
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
At the risk of being slightly repetitious 
Gonna ask you now to stop! (Stop!)
Sending me that... (Crap!)
I don't want it!
Don't send it to me
Now don't send it to me!

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Just stop! 
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Ohh...
Stop forwarding that crap to me
To me



Wikipedia says:

12"Stop Forwarding That Crap to Me"[14]5:42Style parody of the work of Jim Steinman[15]A diatribe against sending the narrator useless junk emails. The music video is a kinetic typography representation of the lyrics made by Koos Dekker.

Fresh stuff from Weird Al.


Wikipedia says:  
Alpocalypse is the 13th studio album by "Weird Al" Yankovic, released on June 21, 2011. 

Links:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alpocalypse
http://weirdal.wikia.com/wiki/Stop_Forwarding_That_Crap_To_Me

Yes.  There's a Weird Al Wiki.

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