Stop Forwarding That Crap To Me

Another gift from Stephie.

We had some offenders in common.  

Shup.

The lyrics:

Oh the sand keeps falling through the hourglass
And there's no way you're going to slow it down
You say we gotta treasure each moment
Who knows how long we're gonna be around

Yeah you keep on telling me life is short
And its hard to disagree with what you say
But if time is so precious why ya wasting mine
'Cause I'm always reading, always deleting
Every useless piece of garbage that you send my way

Every stupid hoax
All those corny jokes
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Well I don't need tons of cringe-inducing puns
Stop forwarding that crap to me

No it isn't okay if you brighten my day 
With some cut-and-pasted hackneyed Hallmark poetry
And I didn't request a personality test
Stop forwarding that crap to me

Ahhhh...
You're sending virus-laden bandwidth-hogging attachments 
To every single person you know
You're passing around a link to some dumb thing on YouTube
That everybody else already saw three years ago
And wacky badly Photoshopped billboards 
Were never that amusing to me
And I just can't believe you believe those urban legends
But I have high hopes 
Someone will point you toward Snopes
And debunk that crazy junk you're spewing constantly

No I don't want a bowl of Chicken Soup for the Soul
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Send more top 10 lists and I'll slash my wrists
Please stop forwarding that crap to me

Well I'm sorry i can't accept your paranoid rant
And I don't want the Neiman Marcus cookie recipe

Won't you kindly refrain 'cause it's hurting my brain
Stop forwarding... that crap to me

Like glittery hearts and unicorns 
And pictures of somebody's cat
Now tell me, in what alternate reality 
Would I care about something like that?

And by the way, your quotes from George Carlin 
Aren't really George Carlin
Mr. Rogers never fought the Viet Cong
And Bill Gates is never gonna give me somethin' for nothin'
And I really doubt some dead girl is gonna kill me 
If I don't pass her letter along

Well now I know you're wishin'
I'll sign your petition
But stop forwarding that crap to me
And I don't want to read your series 
Of conspiracy theories
Just stop forwarding that crap to me

And your two million loser friends
All have my address now, 
'Cause you never figured out the way to BCC

Now I gotta insist
Take me off of your list
Stop forwarding that crap to me
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Just stop it now
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Oh, no
(Stop forwarding that crap to me) 
Ohhh...

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
I can't take it
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Aw, please
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
You gotta stop
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Right now
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
I'm not kidding!
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
At the risk of being slightly repetitious 
Gonna ask you now to stop! (Stop!)
Sending me that... (Crap!)
I don't want it!
Don't send it to me
Now don't send it to me!

(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Just stop! 
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)
Ohh...
Stop forwarding that crap to me
To me

Wikipedia says:

12

"Stop Forwarding That Crap to Me"[14]

5:42

Style parody of the work of Jim Steinman[15]

A diatribe against sending the narrator useless junk emails. The music video is a kinetic typography representation of the lyrics made by Koos Dekker.

Fresh stuff from Weird Al.

Wikipedia says:  

Alpocalypse is the 13th studio album by "Weird Al" Yankovic, released on June 21, 2011. 

Links:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alpocalypse
http://weirdal.wikia.com/wiki/Stop_Forwarding_That_Crap_To_Me

Yes.  There's a Weird Al Wiki.

Yes, Donny did his own choreography.

The man deserves some kind of an award for this.

Mandi Bierly interviewing Donny Osmond for Entertainment Weekly on Popwatch:

Everybody knows "White & Nerdy."
Oh, isn’t that the best thing?

Even better than the actual video is that first take, with just you and Al.
Oh, did you see it on YouTube?

Many, many times.
Al called me up and said, "Can I get your permission to put this on?" And I said, "Well, you gotta send it to me, Al." And so I showed my wife and my kids and we were just on the floor dying. You know, it’s one of those things, Mandi, where I’m proud and embarrassed at the same time.

Everybody loves it.
I know. It’s opened up a whole new audience. For instance, when I was doing Beauty and the Beast, I was crossing the street to walk into the theater and this teenager yells out to everybody, "Hey look, there’s that ‘White & Nerdy’ guy!" [Laughs] I thought, you know, my career has come to this. I’ve tried so hard to turn around the old Donny & Marie image and now I’m white and nerdy again. [Laughs]

The dancing, was that all your own choreography?
That was spur of the moment, baby.

No.
That was off the top of my head.

No it was not.
It was! As a matter of fact, when Al called me, it was so funny, ’cause I’ve known him for years. He said, "Donny, I wrote this parody on ‘Ridin’ Dirty,’ and it’s called ‘White & Nerdy’ and you’re the first one I thought of." And I said, "Thanks, Al. Appreciate it." So I walk in the studio, and I remember thinking to myself, If I do this half-baked it’s gonna be so bad. I gotta go 110 percent on this thing. And he said, "Well, what are you gonna do?" And I said, "I don’t know. But give me 5 minutes to think about it." So as you see, Al’s in front of me and I’m in the background and we start. And as I’m dancin’, the cameramen, the crew, the wardrobe people, everybody, their jaws drop to the floor. And I’m thinkin’ to myself, Oh, this is bad. Because nobody’s reacting. They’re just staring at me. And I said, ”No, don’t give up. Just keep going. Just keep going.” And by the end of the song, everybody just died laughing. And Al turns around and looks at me and says, ”What did you do?” [Laughs] And I said, "I don’t know." And we watched the first take, and we were just dyin’.

It’s like you don’t think it can get any better, and then you’re doing booty slaps.
I know. That’s unbelievable.

Links:
http://popwatch.ew.com/2007/03/22/donny_osmond_gr/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_%26_Nerdy
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Donnie_Osmond

What about "Heat"? (repost)

Asked here.

I'm loathe to recommend Heat to you because I'm invested in it and don't want to see the negative (or even lukewarm) reviews later. I have the DVD and I have a place in my movie buff heart for the movie and while it is readily available, I feel I want to be stingy with it, like I own it, and see if the potential viewer is really interested and in the right mindset and likely to love it and join the club before I screen it, because as well-reviewed as the movie is, it's not guaranteed. It's moody and it is a Mann film and it's a long one. You choose to watch Heat, you're making a commitment.

That said, there are some movies that are like canonical milestones and cultural touchstones, like The Godfather, and Heat is one of them. Some say it is one of the best cops-and-robbers films ever made. DeNiro, Pacino and Kilmer, three of the finest actors in recent time, are in the movie interacting with each other and playing off each other in a kind of testosterone-fueled artistic tango (a big deal at the time and still a big deal now for movie buffs, like seeing Johnson and Jordan shoot hoops together). The characters are complex, as is the story and the dialogue. The look and feel of the movie is pure magic Mann. A lot has been said about the "chicken and the egg" dynamic to DeNiro's and Pacino's acting and the directing of Coppola and Scorcese. Do they portray criminals exceptionally well or do criminals play them (modeling themselves on DeNiro and Pacino and characters in the films of Coppola and Scorcese)? This movie would be one of the essential supporting arguments in an essay on that subject. Serious cinephiles have seen and talked about this movie. DeNiro fans have seen this movie. Mann fans have seen this movie. Guys who use movies as a model for adult masculine behavior and quote lines from The Godfather when giving advice have seen this movie. Also, Ashley Judd is in the movie and she is stunning. (The cast list is impressive and interesting.)

J. A. Lindstrom said:

Todd McCarthy of Variety referred to its "classic western-like structure," and pronounced the film "an ambitious study of the relativity of good and evil." Duane Byrge of the Hollywood Reporter called the film a "down-and-dirty noir crime story."' Kenneth Turan of the L.A. Times determined the film to be "a classic heist movie." And David Ansen of Newsweek found that Mann "reinvests the genre [the crime movie] with brooding modernist conviction." Michael Mann himself added to the indecision by proclaiming, "HEAT is a drama, not a genre piece." (Fuller)

Roger Ebert said:

It's not just an action picture. Above all, the dialogue is complex enough to allow the characters to say what they're thinking: They are eloquent, insightful, fanciful, poetic when necessary. They're not trapped with cliches. Of the many imprisonments possible in our world, one of the worst must be to be inarticulate - to be unable to tell another person what you really feel. These characters can do that. Not that it saves them.

Todd McCarthy said:

"Heat" occupies an exalted position among the countless contemporary crime films. Stunningly made and incisively acted by a large and terrific cast, Michael Mann's ambitious study of the relativity of good and evil stands apart from other films of its type by virtue of its extraordinarily rich characterizations and its thoughtful, deeply melancholy take on modern life. Draw of the star names and critical buzz will be undercut somewhat by pic's somberness and three-hour running time to result in sultry if not sizzling B.O., while foreign and long-term video prospects are potent.

Heat cast list from Wikipedia:

Cast

• Al Pacino as Lt. Vincent Hanna
• Robert De Niro as Neil McCauley
• Val Kilmer as Chris Shiherlis
• Jon Voight as Nate
• Tom Sizemore as Michael Cheritto
• Diane Venora as Justine Hanna
• Amy Brenneman as Eady
• Ashley Judd as Charlene Shiherlis
• Mykelti Williamson as Sgt. Drucker
• Wes Studi as Det. Cassals
• Ted Levine as Det. Bosko
• Dennis Haysbert as Donald Breedan
• William Fichtner as Roger Van Zant
• Natalie Portman as Lauren Gustafson
• Tom Noonan as Kelso
• Kevin Gage as Waingro*
• Hank Azaria as Alan Marciano
• Danny Trejo as Trejo
• Henry Rollins as Hugh Benny
• Tone Lōc as Richard Torena
• Jeremy Piven as Dr. Bob
• Xander Berkeley as Ralph

Links:
http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/19951215/REVIEWS/512150302/1023
http://www.variety.com/review/VE1117904741?refcatid=31
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/1068182-heat/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heat_(1995_film)
http://www.ejumpcut.org/archive/onlinessays/JC43folder/Heat.html
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113277/

*Waingro is a separate and interesting story all its own.

Good Things

1.  My DVR
2.  On Demand
3.  iTunes
4.  My Kindle
5.  Youtube
6.  HBO, Starz and Showtime...for TV series.
7.  The Internet
8.  Marathon viewings of a TV series.
9.  Fish tacos and seafood enchiladas.
10.  Gingertinis, Manhattans, mojitos and sangria.
11.  My cat
12.  Skype
13.  Golf
14.  Tea
15.  Google
16.  Google Doodles
17.  Clean sheets
18.  Fountain and rollerball pens
19.  Sunsets
20.  Blues bars

Why yes, yes I am white and nerdy.

Thanks to Spaceman Opus and his "Boycott Weird Al!" parody thread on SC MKII Stephie and I are now running through all the Weird Al vids on Youtube and running down memory lane in the process.

"White & Nerdy" is still my all-time favorite Weird Al song & video.  Donnie Osmond really sells it.

Stephie likes "White & Nerdy," "Amish Paradise" and "The Saga Begins."

I think "Couch Potato" is working its way up the rankings.  "It's All About The Pentiums" too.

And this is the one from Spaceman's thread:

Stephie and I both like Al's version, but Stephie is distracted by the weird floating overlay of Al's face on the dancer.

"When classical music masterpieces become soundtrack cliches" (Culture Monster, Los Angeles Times 2008)

I like this article by David Ng on the Los Angeles Times website.  I admit to being a fan of a number of these pieces and their uses in film (Orff's "Carmina Burana" in John Boorman's Excalibur is a favorite classic movie scene.)  I've added Youtube clips for quick and easy listening reference.

David Ng of the Los Angeles Times said:

There are certain classical pieces that are repeated so often at the movies that they've lost virtually all power to move or surprise us. Certainly Wagner's "The Ride of the Valkyries," which featured prominently in "8 1/2" and "Apocalypse Now," ranks among the classically clichéd. So do Bach's Cello Suite No. 1 (Prelude), Orff's "Carmina Burana" and most of Beethoven's symphonies.

David Ng of the Los Angeles Times said:  

"The recent trailer for David Fincher's "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" (see the video above) features Camille Saint-Saëns' "Aquarium" from "The Carnival of Animals." This eerie, impressionistic 1886 composition was most famously used in Terrence Malick's "Days of Heaven." It also serves as the unofficial anthem of the Cannes Film Festival, where fans can hear it played ad nauseum on the red carpet."

David Ng of the Los Angeles Times said:  

Barber's "Adagio for Strings" also suffers from multiplex abuse. The 1936 piece has been used in "The Elephant Man," "Platoon," "Wild Reeds" and "Amélie."

David Ng of the Los Angeles Times said:  

Arvo Pärt's "Spiegel im Spiegel" (1978) and "Für Alina" (1976) are art-film favorites that are hauled out whenever a director wants to establish a feeling of existential melancholy. You may have heard them in "There Will Be Blood," "Gerry," "Heaven" and "W;t."

David Ng of the Los Angeles Times said:

Charles Ives' "The Unanswered Question" (1906) has suffered less wear and tear than the above titles, but it's already starting to show the signs of film fatigue, having been trotted out in "Run Lola Run," "The Thin Red Line" and (again) "W;t."

Link:  http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/culturemonster/2008/09/when-classical.html

Michael Mann Fan

GradyE asked:

"Do you like Michael Mann?"

Why yes, yes I do.

"High for This" by The Weeknd on House of Balloons (Entourage)

I love the Entourage promo with "High for This" by The Weeknd (aka Abel Tesfaye) as the soundtrack.  Tracking down the music proved to take more than the usual quick Google and then iTunes or Amazon download procedure I normally follow.  I ended up downloading "House of Balloons" directly from the-weeknd.com.  Further inquiries led to an interesting backstory.

Wikipedia says:

"Songs recorded under The Weeknd name first leaked in late 2010, though the identity of the individual behind the project was initially unknown.^[3][4]"

"Preceded by a string of low-profile buzz single releases throughout 2010, the identity behind The Weeknd was kept secret from the public which attracted significant interest."

Rolling Stone said:

"Artist to Watch: The WeekndMysterious R&B-influenced singer recalls Drake, The-Dream, Aaliyah on first mixtape. Listen now.

The 20-year-old singer-songwriter (real name: Abel Tesfaye) from Toronto is on the forefront of an idiosyncratic new cut of R&B. Thanks in part to support from fellow Toronto native Drake, he's been in heavy rotation since the March 21st release of his mixtape debutHouse of Balloons.

The Weeknd layers House of Balloons with samples (Siouxsie and the Banshees’s 1980 "Happy House," Beach House‘s 2006 "Master of None"), electronic synths and hip-hop references, accompanied by Frank Ocean from Odd Future and How To Dress Well. There are also traces of The-Dream, Drake and Aaliyah throughout."

death + taxes said:

"Here’s another un/official video for one of the gems off The Weeknd‘s heavily praised “House of Ballons” mixtape. In typical Weeknd anti-press, it’s unclear whether Abel Tesfaye approved or comissioned the video.

The clip, directed by filmaker Storm Saulter (“Better Mus’ Come“), is set in Portland, Jamaica—an unlikely location that works surprisingly well with “Wicked Games” haunting vibe. It features all the rolled-up bills, topless actresses, and plenty more drug/sex scenarios thatThe Weeknd seems to exclusively sing about." 

Links:
http://the-weeknd.com/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Weeknd
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_of_Balloons
http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/artist-to-watch-the-weeknd-20110329
http://www.rollingstone.com/music/songreviews/rolling-stone-20110608
http://www.deathandtaxesmag.com/98584/the-weeknd-wicked-games-nsfw-video/

Flights of Fashion

From MSNBC.msn.com:

"This unnamed, scantily-dressed passenger was allowed to fly US Airways from Fort Lauderdale, Fla., to Phoenix. The photo was captured by passenger Jill Tarlow."

Link:  http://overheadbin.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/06/23/6918363-gross-5-things-not-to-do-on-a-plane

Ozzie Takin' the Piss

Ozzie Takin' the Piss


So I cut-and-paste eku's Tim Tam technique request (from SLU) into my Skype conversation with my "authentic Australian" and then sent said Ozzie a link to this thread. Since then I have been treated to an onslaught of Skype posts taking the piss out of the way I and my American brethren talk and even the type of treats we eat.

For example:

* You Dumericans don't just overpronounce your Rs, you also overpronounce your Gs. It's "fucking" not "fuckin-guh."
* Vehicle becomes vee-hickle.
* Anzac biscuits and Tim Tams rule. You can shove your Oreos.
* See...? Not everything in Australia is trying to kill you. Unless you count diabetes...
* Everything in America is fake.
* I'm not afraid of you or that Joshua bloke.

And then there was this:




Fine print: Yes, she knows I'm posting this. Yes, it is all meant in fun. We're old friends and she has a permanent dent in her cheek. No, the dent is not from me punching her. No Skyping SLUers were harmed in the making of this post.




She's threatening to "fix the crack in the Liberty Bell" now. Oh, it's ON. 

ETA: She also said in response to Jopsy, "maybe his hearing aids get feedback and it makes a funny sound."

ETA2: I hope others see why I find her so damn funny too. Irreverent and cheeky and soooo wrong, but funny.

ETA3: I hope I'm not about to start an international incident.

Smile Steph

http://www.friendsoffoamy.com/

They even have a forum.  Click it!  You know you want to.  Side note:  How's this for irony?  I found the friends of Foamy while visiting a site called http://www.unhelpful.org/.  Add to that irony this vid that I know you were thinking about as you read about the friends of Foamy having a forum:

Killer Queen Cover & Man in Crate

http://www.youtube.com/user/Freddie25

http://freddegredde.com/

And The Lamb Lies Down In A Crate On Broadway

Artist to lock self in crate with no contact with outside world but Lord of the Rings Online

"How to stop cats pissing on your car" by Craig Turner on Youtube