B of A Hell Zone

I want to log in so I can make my monthly mortgage payment.

I plug in my ID and password.  I'm taken to my SiteKey screen where I see the picture I've chosen and the name of the picture, also chosen by me, meant to be a visual representation to show I'm in the right place and not being phished or something.

I validate the Sitekey pic and name and hit "enter."

I'm taken to a screen that says I need to create a Sitekey, which is interesting because I just came from my Sitekey page.  There is no way to opt out or go forward or backwards.  The only choice is creating a Sitekey.  So I create a new one.  Again.  I go through the process and select security questions and answers and "enter" through to the end.  I receive a message that B of A is "temporarily unable to process my request."  The only thing is, B of A has been "temporarily unable to process my request" for about six months now.

I went paperless some time ago, so plan B is logging into another bank where I do my bill paying, and where they are able to process my log in request in a matter of seconds with no problem at all and look to see what the amounts where the last time I paid my mortgage bills and just repeat them.  So that's what I do.

Then I try the contact information on B of A's website.  I start with "online website technical support" and call the 800 number.  I tell the person who answers that I have a mortgage account.  He proceeds to ask me a series of questions, takes all the information and tells me at the end that I have a mortgage account.  I was actually aware of that and thought he was too since I started with that tidbit.  He tells me he cannot help with mortgage accounts and must transfer me to "model platform."  I get transferred to a man who responds in Spanish.  I tell him my Spanish is a bit rusty and I would prefer to do my business in English.  He tells me he covers every part of the United States except the Pacific Northwest, including, naturally, Washington, so he must transfer me to someone who handles Washington.  I get transferred to someone who tells me they do not handle mortgage accounts and that I need to be transferred to online banking.  Yes, that would be the online banking I called first.

Now the call has been disconnected and I had such high hopes for Connor (the last person I spoke to before the call disconnected.)

I'm in the Bermuda Triangle of Bank of America.  The twilight zone of corporate America.  Online mortgage hell.

All I want to do is pay my bill.